Weight Loss After 40 Comes Down to One Boring Thing

Weight loss for women over 40 rarely comes down to a secret diet, a harder workout, or one more round of cutting carbs. When perimenopause and menopause change how your body responds, real progress comes down to one ordinary habit most women skip right past while they go chasing something faster.

Strangers stop me all the time and ask what my secret is. They want a trick. What I tell them is a lot less exciting than they're hoping for, and it's the exact thing standing between most women over 40 and the results they want.

Inside this episode:

• What strangers assume about my body, and what's really going on
• Why the fast, restrictive approaches cost you more than they give back after 40
• The one number I live by that makes weight loss doable and keeps it off
• How I still order fries, dessert, and wine without it derailing my progress

I lost 20 pounds in my late 30s and kept it off for 10 years through perimenopause, and it wasn't restriction that did it. If you've been hunting for the shortcut everyone else supposedly has, press play, because there isn't one, and what's real is much better news.

RESOURCES:

💪🏼 The Strong Core Method: a 4-week at-home core program for women over 40, built for every level, even if you've never worked out a day in your life. 12 guided workouts per level with video demos, 20 minutes, 3 times a week, to build a stronger, more defined midsection

📝 Grab the FREE Fat Loss Formula Workbook to calculate your exact calorie deficit and maintenance numbers

🎯 Take the FREE ‘What’s My Metabolism Type’ Quiz that identifies your unique metabolism type and get empowered with a personalized plan to manage your weight confidently.

💌 Stay Connected: Join my BTB Newsletter for weekly insight

🎧 Listen Next: The Fastest Path to Fat Loss and Fitness in Your 40s and 50s

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👋🏻 ABOUT ME: 

I'm Andrea, a double-certified NASM Nutrition and Fitness Coach and founder of Behind the Body. For 20 years, I under-ate, avoided weights, and lived on cardio chasing skinny, and none of it gave me a body I was proud of. In my mid-30s, I changed my approach: more protein, real strength training, and a plan that fit my life. I lost 20 pounds, and 10 years later, at 45, I'm still maintaining it through perimenopause. I help women over 40 simplify their approach, build real strength, and get results that last. Every week, I cover the science, the strategy, and the honest truth about fat loss and maintenance for women over 40.

MEDICAL DISCLAIMER: 

This content is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider before making changes to your diet, exercise, or health routine. Results vary. Andrea is a NASM-certified Nutrition and Fitness Coach, not a doctor or registered dietitian.

Transcript

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Okay, this is not a vanity thing, but I just want to paint a picture because there's no better way to explain this. But for so long, strangers have literally stopped me and asked me what I do to look the way that I do. It happens at the gym, at the grocery store, out running errands, at the airport, wherever I am. Usually I'm wearing workout gear or like a tank top or something. And I'm assuming it's because I'm rather lean and have probably more muscle than a typical woman. But every time I know what they're really hoping that I'll say, how I'll respond. They want a secret. They want some trick that I figured out that nobody else knows about. And honestly, I get a little embarrassed every time they ask because of course I don't have a secret. And I could really never come up with something interesting enough to entertain their question. So I decided to really think about why people are asking me this. Like, what do they see when they stop me? And what I come up with is the most ordinary, unglamorous thing in the world. But it's also the exact thing that most people keep skipping over while they go chasing something seemingly better or faster. So in this episode, I want you to stop looking for that magic answer because I'm gonna give you the real one that makes all the difference. And in case you're new here, I'm Andrea. I lost 20 pounds in my mid to late 30s and I kept it off for 10 years through perimetopause. And I'm a double certified nutrition and fitness coach. Let me tell you what people are really seeing when they look at me, why it works for us women over 40 when nothing else seemingly does, and how you can start doing it even on the days where you're nowhere near perfect. I'm Andrea and welcome to Behind the Body. If you're over 40 and trying to lose fat, build muscle, or take better care of your health, you're in the right place. Every week we'll tackle the questions women over 40 are asking about nutrition, fitness, metabolism, and aging, helping you spend less time doing what doesn't move the needle and more time focusing on what does without the extremes or the all or nothing mindset. What people see when they look at me is really just a sum of a lot of ordinary days where I did the healthy thing when I didn't feel like it. Meaning I'm incredibly consistent. That's the whole secret. And I know that's about the least exciting sentence that I could say out loud. And if you're ready to tune out of this podcast episode, don't hang with me because I promise it gets deeper. Let me tell you what that looks like for me and be forewarned that again, it's so much less impressive than people want it to be, but it's so important. Take the gym, for example. I go to the gym roughly four to five days a week. And on plenty of those days, I don't want to be there. I don't want to go. I'm either tired or bloated, or just in a mood where I'd literally rather do anything else. And I don't pretend I'm above that. I am human. I'll even say it out loud in my husband on many mornings when we're having coffee and I'm getting ready to head out the door to go to the gym. This is always what I say. I don't want to. I don't feel like it. And I'm I'm just being a little baby about it because there's nothing stopping me to go other than I just don't feel like it. It is so common, in fact, that if I call him within 15 minutes of leaving the house, he'll pick up the phone. And the first thing he says to me is, get in the gym, because he knows I'm sitting in my car in the gym parking lot, doing everything I can to procrastinate from having to go in. But when I say this, usually I am lacing up my shoes or grabbing my energy drink or walking out the door or literally sitting in my car in the gym parking lot. But not feeling like it, not feeling like going or working out has never once been a good enough reason for me to skip it. And the things that save me on those days is kind of twofold. The first is I have no good reason not to go, other than I don't feel like it. But that's not a good reason. There's no sickness or illness that I have. There's no important calendar conflict that takes precedent. Like if there's no true reason that's obstructing me from going or keeping me from going, I have really no good excuse not to. And then also what saves me is that I tell myself, if I really don't feel like it and I'm dragging, just go and do 30 minutes. I mean, 30 minutes is nothing, right? I give myself permission to go lighter than usual or just do a few exercises. And that's completely fine because I kept my commitment and went anyway. The workout doesn't have to be great. I just don't let myself have that out. And this is important because the second I give myself permission to skip just this once, then that can easily turn into a habit. The habit is what changes your body in whatever direction you keep feeding it. When it comes to food, diet, and nutrition, that all works in the same way for me as well. I don't restrict and I'm not always eating perfectly either. And if you follow me on social media or you see me or know me in real life, a lot of people look at me and think because I'm lean and have a lot of muscle, that I must maintain this super restrictive lifestyle. But that cannot be further from the truth. French fries are my favorite food and I eat them a couple times a week. I drink wine when I want to. I go out for happy hours and brunches and dinners and I enjoy them all. But I also don't give myself a free-for-all when I do eat out because that's where it can so easily get away from me. So when I do order something indulgent, I don't just eat it as is, and then on top of that, order an appetizer and cocktails and dessert. I will order something that's indulgent, but I'll clean it up a little bit. So instead of a version that's maybe 2,000 calories, I'll order it in a way that's closer to a thousand calories and it's still genuinely delicious. This is an example of that. When I used to eat meat, I would order a filet, but I would ask for it to be cooked without butter because a lot of restaurants cook it with butter. Or I will get steamed vegetables rather than sauteed vegetables and butter or oil. Or I'll order a baked potato instead of potatoes all gratten, and I will ask for all the toppings, which I do love on my baked potato, to be on the side so that I can put them on myself and control the portion. Or I'll get a salad and ask for the dressing on the side so I can control that portion as well. So nothing is really sacrificed, but I do get to clean it up with some things that I will not miss and that to me don't compromise the taste or the experience. And because of that, I feel so well balanced. I feel I'm not sacrificing or white knuckling anything. I'm just making good decisions more often than bad ones and letting myself live the rest of the time without guilt. And that part matters so much more than people realize. I don't reprimand myself. I don't spiral over eating, you know, a quote unquote unhealthy meal or a weekend of eating out or even a week-long vacation where I'm eating out every single day. The people who live life with me, my husband and my closest friends, they will tell you that I totally enjoy life and that I don't sacrifice the foods that I really want. I make solid choices the majority of the time. And I've stopped attaching shame to the times that I don't. And that matters so much. So why does this ordinary approach be the more intense ones or fads or quick fixes? It's because those don't last. And over 40, they cost you way more than they give you back. We are wired as a society, as a culture, and as women to want fast results. We want to cut out all of our carbs completely. We want to go as hard as we can with our calorie deficits. We want to lose as much weight as we can as quickly as we can. That's just the way that we are wired. And that actually does work for a few weeks, which is exactly why it makes that so tempting. But that isn't something that a real life, like your actual lifestyle, can hold on to long term because it's unsustainable. And because it's unsustainable, then you ultimately eventually back off from that approach. The weight comes back, and then you end up even farther behind than when you started. And in our 40s and 50s, that hard, restrictive style does more than just backfire on your weight. It stresses your body out, it drains your energy and your quality of life for results that you were never going to be able to maintain when all your body needed was a little more consistency with the healthy stuff than the unhealthy stuff. And what's more is that women think that they have to be 100% or 90% or even 80% compliant towards their diet or fitness goals in order to make progress or in order for it to be worth it. That kind of thinking can be the exact reason that you never hit your goals because that's asking a lot from anybody's life. It's impossible for anybody to be 80% compliant all of the time, right? You have kids, you have families, you have stress, you have jobs, careers, travel and vacations, and I mean a million different things that make it virtually impossible for you to maintain 80% compliance all the time. Sometimes you may be able to hit 80%, sometimes I do. Sometimes I hit 50%, and that's okay. My motto is, and this is how I live as well. And if I get more than this, great. But what I tell myself is if I can be 60% compliant, if you can do the good thing, the healthy thing more often than you don't, your body will respond positively. Sure, it might be slower at first, but I always say, and if you're multitasking, come back to me because I want you to hear this. Slow is the fastest way to lose weight. Not only will you reach your goal eventually, but you'll also be able to maintain it long term and you'll have created amazing healthy habits along the way. 60% is the number that can literally change things, not just now or in the short term, but long term, because it's a number that you can reliably hit. But I also want you to be super honest with yourself about one thing, because the same way that consistency built my results, it can build the opposite when it's pointed in the wrong direction. If you're consistently eating out, consistently skipping shopping for healthy groceries, consistently talking yourself out of going for the walk or going to the gym, that all adds up too. And that all gets you farther away from what you want. So you have to have an honest conversation with yourself. Are the outs that you're giving yourself, the excuses, the permissions not to do the healthy things, are they real or are they just comfortable excuses that you've gotten used to leaning on? And I say this with all the love because I used to be that person and I still recognize it in myself. It's still sometimes the default that I want to go to. But I ask myself this all the time when I'm complaining to my husband about not wanting to go to the gym. Is this excuse a real one? Or am I just trying to get myself permission to lean on it? And if part of what's stopping you is that you're not even sure what the right things are for your body, what you should be doing to lose weight, to hit that 60% consistency or more, that's worth sorting out first because you can't be consistent with a plan that you don't have or you don't even know where to start. I have a free metabolism quiz I created for exactly this. It takes about two minutes and it tells you what's going on with your body, with your lifestyle, with your habits, so that you know what to be consistent with. But I'll talk about that more in a second. So if you've been out there looking for this trick or this secret that I and others know, but you don't, please hear me when I say that there isn't one. The result that you're after is on the other side of a lot of ordinary, boring, unglamorous days done more often than not. It's being consistent with the right things. And that's actually the best news that I can give you because ordinary is easy. It's simple. The only thing standing between you and the results you want is how often you let yourself off the hook. Okay, your next step is simple. The fastest way to make all this consistency pay off is to point it at the right things for your specific body. And this tells you what those are. The free metabolism type quiz tells you which of the five metabolism types you are, and you'll find out exactly what's holding back your specific results and what to focus on first. You'll get a customized plan sent directly to your email. I'll link that free quiz in the show notes below. Okay, my friend, if this episode was helpful, if it made you think, if there were any aha moments, I would love for you to subscribe to the podcast so that the next episode lands in your library automatically. And if you have an extra 10 seconds, it would mean the absolute most to me if you could please leave a quick rating for the podcast. It's the single biggest factor that helps other women like us over 40 find these episodes. And if you want more on all things health, fitness, nutrition, and lifestyle for us women over 40, come and join the behind the body community. Every week I will send you something straight to your inbox to help you keep making progress. You can sign up for free at behind the body.com forward slash newsletter. Thank you so much for tuning in, my friend, and I can't wait to chat with you next week.